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Profile: rdad | PM

Your doing good. Just keep everyone talking.

Perhaps the school counselor can give you some tips on how you can help him adjust and how much time it might take.

You didn't mention anything about the step-dad trying to bond with him.

Thanks for the input.

I did have another discussion with his mother about setting aside "mom/kid" time even when the whole gang is there. We'll see what happens, but how far do you let it go if he does not adjust to the situation over the next 6 months?

He spoke to his school counselor yesterday about his "anger issues" as he calls them that he has at his mother's house. He was happy to talk to her and excited that she was going to schedule more time for him. Hopefully, it will with the adjustment.

His behavior is regressing when he is over at the other house.

I agree with the mother. He needs to be there when the rest of the family is there. He needs to adjust. She needs to give him some mom/kid time too.

Don't enable him.

I've discussed it with his mother and she just says he is too jealous and will just have to get used to it. I don't want to meddle too much in their business, but when my son cries in my arms for an hour because he is unhappy when "the boys" are around I feel like I have to do something.

If she refuses to adjust her schedule to meet my son's needs, what next? Does he have any rights in that situation to refuse to go to her house?

Everything has been pretty decent for years, but to see my son under this much stress is tough and I don't want the situation to snowball into bigger emotional issues. He is emotionally 3-4 yrs younger at her house than at mine if that makes sense.

Can you discuss the issue with the mother and the stepdad?

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Profile: LeoBasile | PM

I have a 9 year old boy. I have been divorced from his mother for 7.5 years now. We started with a 50/50 time arrangment which over the years has turned into 60% for me and 40% for her. About a year ago, I started hearing grumblings from my son that his mother didn't make as much time for him as she used to. I tried to get him to work up the courage to tell her about it, but he ddidn't want to hurt her feelings. About 6 months ago, she starting dating a man with 4 boys ranging from 4-15 yrs old. Now not only does he not get the attention he wants from his mother, he has to compete for it with other boys. The sad part is that they are getting the attention because she is trying to bond with them. They all sleep at his mother's every other weekend when the dad has them. My ex asked me to switch our weekends around to coordinate my son being there when the other boys are there, but that is the exact opposite of what my son wants. He wants to be there when the other boys are not. This has caused him a large amount of stress over the last few months. My question is what do I do when my son tells me he doesn't want to go to his mother's house and she doesn't want to change the schedule???

I'm not trying to make a case to reduce her time, but what do you do when the mother isn't taking advantage of the time she has with the child?

Hi, ladad1168 has joined you. Let's start ...

Profile: ladad1168 | PM

Well, you have to present a good case and then appeal. Tis the only way.

Judges can get reported to the Judicial Commission. But they will probably not anything unless you prevail in civil court first.